Glutton for Punishment

Posted: July 28, 2016 in Creative Writing
Tags: , , , , ,

When it comes to movies, I’m a huge glutton for punishment.  Growing up I was a huge fan of Steven Seagal movies.  My favorites were Under Siege and Under Siege 2.  The things that drew me to these movies were;

  1. Steven Seagal at the time was in really good shape and kicked ass on the screen.
  2. He almost always portrays a Special Ops soldier, elite cop, or a deadly contractor, which is one of the many reasons I wanted to be a Soldier.
  3. He made Aikido look extremely bad ass.  Generally when you see a video of someone using Aikido it’s methodical and slowly performed.  When Seagal does Aikido it’s extremely violent and fun to watch.

So as a kid all those things made me keep wanting to watch all of his movies.  Unforturnately the habit of watching his movies has continued into adulthood.  Watching his often times apparent B movies usually turns into such a disappointment.  The things that really kill my interest in his movies now adays are;

  1. Seagal is no longer in shape.  He has become an out of shape slug who seems to get winded after a stroll.
  2. The special effects in these movies are way over the top and look extremely fake.  He hits someone with a 5.56mm bullet and their chest or head just seems to explode outward in a ridiculous spray of blood.
  3. Dialogue from all actors seems forced and extremely dry.
  4. Endless magazines.  Most people who watch a movie don’t seem to mind magazines that have a never ending supply of bullets, but after being in the military for so long I just can’t handle it.  When you load a 30 round magazine and fire it full auto, that magazine will only last a a few seconds yet these guys can spray for a couple minutes at a time.

Even with all these things I hate to see though, I still buy these movies and watch them to the end.  You would think I would stop watching them, but everytime I get one I’m hoping to see at least a spark of the old Seagal that I used to love watching.

So let me know what you think.  Do you watch a certain actor or B movies even if the movies arent’ that great.  Let me know in the comments below, and as always likes/follows/shares/ and comments are always welcome.

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